Hello Lovely Savers!
I want to let you in on a little secret of mine… I am the WORST at saying “no”. I am always guilty of spreading myself too thin, running here and there to try to do everything for everyone- and let me tell you, it’s awful. Often times I’d get so stressed out by trying to do everything perfectly for everyone, that I’d miss out on things, get sick, and then disappoint people anyway. It is not a reasonable lifestyle to live for other people. Nice? Sure. Noble? Maybe. Crazy? Definitely.
And that extends into work. In 2016 I had to make the hardest choice I’d ever had to make career wise, I quit my job. And no, not just a job, a job I loved. Why on earth would I give up on a job I loved? Here’s the truth, and this is the first time I am coming clean about it, I was tired.
I was tired of working part-time, after years of being promised more and more hours.
I was tired of insubstantial pay, which I had agreed to, hoping that it would make my trek to full-time faster. I was tired of being underutilized and under-appreciated, I was tired of being treated like I was only 22. Even though, yes, I was only 22.
I wasn’t tired of the work! But as time went on, and more of my efforts were unnoticed or undermined by others in the organization, I had to decide. Once I realized that the organization had no interest in changing how I was used, I had to say “no”. And suddenly, I wasn’t just underutilized, I was selfish. I was selfish because I wanted “things handed to me”, and when I was made to feel selfish, I did. Not only did I believe it, I saw it.
I wasn’t doing my best work, why should I? If I wasn’t going to be their priority, why should they be mine? One day I looked at my computer, realized how messed up that mentality was, and sent in my two weeks.
I told everyone it was because I was going to run my own company, which I was doing on the side, and which was true in part. But that wasn’t why I left, and I still felt so selfish on the inside that I was too embarrassed to say “I wasn’t going anywhere where I was, and I had to think about myself”. It was as if by saying that, I would be admitting that they were right, that I WAS selfish. Now several months later, I am able (if only just barely) to say THAT IS NOT OK.
You have to take care of yourself! I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “you can’t pour from an empty cup”, and 2016 was my year to see how true that is. You should not feel selfish for saying “no”, and any organization or person who calls you selfish for that, should probably take a good long look in the mirror.
This year, in 2017, say “no”. Put your foot down! Do what you have to do so that you can be your best self, because when you feel like you are doing your best work- you are. Tired of credit card debt? Say NO to using that card. Tired of spending too much money out at restaurants with your friends? Say NO and suggest a night in, or god-forbid take some time for yourself (personally still working on that one). Tired of your job? SAY NO! Go find one that makes you feel like you matter and that your work makes an impact! In 2017, ‘No’ is NOT a bad word.
Sugar and Savings,
XOXO
Taylor
